Last night while the game was on, the impossible happened. No, not the fact that the Mavericks came back from 15 down with 7 minutes to go, and no Justin Bieber didn’t grow facial hair.…I’m talking about a Brian Cardinal sighting! Even more so, a Brian Cardinal sighting in the NBA finals!
Risky move by Jim “Rick Carlisle” Carrey considering there are no second chances in the NBA finals. The biggest knee slapper about the whole thing was ABC’s decision to showcase to the world Cardinal's alleged nickname, “The Custodian.” Now I know it’s easy to pick on people when they can’t defend themselves, and I know it’s that much easier when his name is Brian Cardinal, but that’s a low blow.
I have never heard Brian Cardinal being called “The Custodian”, but his career stats certainly defend the pseudonym. In his first three years in the league, Cardinal averaged 5.6 minutes per game, which went hand in hand with his Brian Cardinal leading 1.6 points per game. He then saw a significant skyrocket in minutes played and production, but in recent years has dwindled back down to Earth in regular Brian Cardinal fashion, averaging roughly 3 minutes per game in the last 6 years.
What’s the most remarkable thing about “The Custodian” is that he signed a six-year 45-million dollar contract after averaging a measly 9.6 ppg, making him one high paying janitor. Cardinal made 7.5 million a year to virtually sit courtside to watch some of the greatest athletes in the world perform. So we can joke all we want about the trash man Brian Cardinal, but when was the last time you got paid to sit courtside? And is it just me or does he look an awfully lot like Jason Statham, just a lot less badass? Only in America my friends.
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